I’m wondering if you read my last response to a comment on this essay, because that reader also thought that I was somehow speaking against white men — rather than white masculinity as a construct (as I literally stated in the original essay). I have nothing against white men as individuals. My son is a white man; so is his dad. And I’m a sociologist by training and we’d be the last to say anything is “just” a “personal problem.” But hey, I think your interpretation of what I’ve written really draws attention to a challenge we face in handling these topics without making people feel either targeted or left out.
Though I am discussing white maleness, as a construct — which can be perpetuated by literally anyone (i.e. not just white men), there’s plenty of evidence to say that white men really are best at it and have the longest history. If we’re talking about the construct of white maleness in the U.S. presidency, for instance, we could (and should) focus on how every person in that administration is upholding white male dominance as a construct — men, women and people of color. And too, it’d be wrong to ignore that literally every president in the U.S. has actually been male. All but one, white. So it’s easy to get focused on that. It’s also easy for white men who feel underprivileged to say, ‘hey, you’re not talking about me’ or ‘not all men’ but when you look at traditional forms of privilege (money, power, control of land and policies) there are mostly white men in privileged positions. Even though most white men are NOT in those positions, most in those positions are white men. See? So, how do we speak about white maleness as a construct without offending white men? I wish I knew. It’s like using the word “tangerine” as a color. We know what that color looks like because of the item it’s referencing: tangerines. That doesn’t mean every item the color of a tangerine sweet and juicy. But a lot of the fruits called “tangerine” are going to be the color tangerine. The reference point for white masculinity as a construct is indeed, white men in their most over-privileged, arrogant, blustery state.
Oh, maybe the whole tangerine thing went too far….
I think these discussions requires a bit of toughening up through some discomfort in order to really get to the part where we can make some meaningful change — as I said in my previous response. I have to do it, in order not to feel hurt when folks talk about my privileged identities. You have to do it too.
